Chile…
July 2001
I visited a dear soul partner, Diana, in Chile for nearly the entire month of July, 2001. The beginning of our relationship came as quite the surprise, and to many it probably seems quite 'weird' only in a good way. I saw her in a vision several years before and had physically met her the previous September at the Gathering of Souls Conference in Camp Verde, Arizona. The recognition at our initial physical encounter was more of a magnet that neither one of us quite understood, yet denial was not an option. It wasn't until I was standing in the parking garage at Sky Harbor Airport watching her plane back away from the gate that the vision I had revisited me.
During the conference the day after we met, Diana related that I was introduced to her by Ashtar in a dream-vision she had about a week before coming to America for the event. It is rare that I have these experiences with such intensity and it was obvious to both of us that we have a much greater mission together than our human understanding could comprehend at the time. Nonetheless, our humanness and passion, both being Cancers, was quite lively and the urge to merge was overwhelming to say the least. She knew me to be the son of Ashtar from her personal experience, so here I was faced with yet another hard to accept 'validation' of some kind.
The coordinators introduced me to the gathering as
well, which brought both uncomfort and release. I felt like I didn't have to
deny part of what I know about myself. I was also asked to take a leadership
role in the mission of Unity among
humanity at the close of the conference. It felt so right and yet so out of this
world that I had quite the challenge as to how to integrate the this experience
in some kind of action that made sense. Several months after the Gathering,
I began work on Mission: Earth Dance, which was a series of weekend gatherings
designed to bring people of purpose together for developing strategies to work
with disenfranchised youth. Diana had also begun a similar event to our Mission: Earth Dance in Phoenix, called “Danza de la Tierra” or Dance of the Earth,
My arrival caused an upheaval in her family life for the duration of my stay. Apparently the estranged relationship with the father of her boys (3 and 5 at the time) was not as distant as perceived. Nonetheless, I began my stay in a one-bedroom cottage not far from her home. I was distraught over the apparent pain that the boys' father was experiencing. The cottage was a comfortable, yet simple, environment with no TV or telephone. It was quite soothing to be honest. The first morning I awoke in this wonderful land I was greeted by a male Spanish voice. It actually woke me up. The words of welcome he spoke are etched in my heart forever, "La Familia del Norte." It was then I knew my trip had much more importance that I may have realized at first. The unfoldment of my experience was better than any book could have been written. My mind and heart were full of love and contentment in this beautiful land of the Mapuche. I wear their symbols still, a male and female deity, as an honored connection to these people.
I was invited to the July Danza de la Tierra event in Valparaiso. The meeting was in a beautiful turn of the century building whose architecture and wooden floors gave an ambience of royalty or at least a deep sense of cultural heritage. There was an alter set up at the front of the room with the symbols of earth, fire, air, and water as well as various other symbols of reverence to life. My beloved partner opened the event with a call for humility and surrender to ALL THAT IS, so that we may all focus on the present and give it our fullest. She then opened the floor for any opening comments.
There were about 50 in
attendance from all walks of professional endeavors, corporate to social
services.
Next, an elderly woman with fire in her brilliant blue eyes stood up and addressed the group. She spoke of how his circle related to some other sacred geometric symbols, which she also drew on the board, and how they too related to our ONENESS. To my surprise she also told of an 'eyes open' vision she had while sitting in the room as the program opened. She told the group that she saw me standing 5 meters tall dressed in white garments with a very large open book in my arms. There was another standing on each side of me dressed in the same white garments that were shining as if they were light. She pointed toward me and told the audience that I was the one they had been waiting for and to listen closely to my words.
As my partner was translating this to me I felt like I wanted to disappear. I was not prepared for such an introduction, as it was so humbling that I did not want to address it any further. I felt like much was expected of me and I simply had to let go and let my heart speak to theirs. I opened with, 'Mi corazon habla tu corazon,' my heart speaks to your heart. It was nonetheless quite an intriguing experience of serendipitous synchronicity. The symbols were above the bullet points of the presentation, so I left them and near the end of the presentation drew them back into how they fit into conscientious project planning. It made for a really nice close that was planned more perfectly than I could have imagined.
I had been asked to prepare a presentation on project management, which I thought would last for the morning session. I wanted to offer the gist of my training through education and practical experience. Although I had been successful in the corporate environment, my heart was set on bringing people together to set and achieve goals worthy of a new world order, one of spiritual solidarity and service to mankind. I gave this presentation with poor Spanish, yet there were several translators who opted to help and we all enjoyed the process, making sure there were plenty of laughs at and with this gringo from the North. I was given the entire day, and there was much interaction as well.
Many spoke openly of their personal activities with various groups and the challenge of working in harmony toward common goals. Others spoke of the difficulty in preparing specific plans for things they knew needed to change and yet they did not feel 'intelligent' enough to develop working plans for change. It was quite a warm and friendly atmosphere with a willingness to share deeply, much different than in the United States now. Even at metaphysical gatherings, people in the US are often at a distance emotionally. You can actually feel the difference in the people's energy.
The South American culture seems much more heart-centered than in the United States. I noticed it particularly when I came back and immediately jumped into an event production capacity. North Americans are so much in the heads with detail and delusions. A gentleman came up to me after the meeting in Valparaiso and acknowledged the 'zen' approach I had used and its heart-centeredness. His statement meant a lot to me, showing I had been able to communicate well. I could tell Arnau was going to make a difference in many people's lives.
The following weekend we were invited to a meeting of the RAMA Mission in Santiago. I had no awareness of this group as of yet, at least on the outer planes of consciousness in my awareness. The only thing that I was told is that it would be a meeting of several smaller groups gathering to discuss opening an ‘inner earth portal’ in Argentina within the next couple of weeks. I was intrigued to say the least. I had 'imagined' working with 'portals' for many years during particular times of meditation and wondered if this would be similar. I hadn't heard of anyone in the US doing this kind of work to date. We arrived at an apartment complex and were greeted most graciously by the entire group of nearly 30 in a one-bedroom apartment living room. I most enjoyed their greeting style, which was a hug and a kiss on the cheek for everyone, male and female alike as open affection is encouraged and demonstrates the warmth of the heart. I find Americans are often constricted by such openness of affection and consideration for others.
The meeting proceeded, in Spanish, with my partner translating
for me again.
One of the young men could speak English fluently so there was also some
exchanges with him. After a few minutes of old business, and briefly discussing their plans for the
coming trip, the elder of the group (late 50s) began to talk about a vision he
had earlier in the week. He described an image of two
cones, one upside down upon the other, with wavy lines of various types
appearing to enter the top and come out the bottom, compressing in the center on
the way through. He did not understand what it meant. I was familiar with the
image he described, a vortex within the hearts of all, and asked if he would
like be to explain it. His eyes shown with the glow of an expectant child
immediately when my partner translated my offering.
It took some minutes of explanation (the process was a bit slow) as I related an explanation of pure sharable energy and how this image was a graphical representation of this pulsing energy moving in and out of the center of our being- our heart of hearts if you will. It is that essence that connects us to All That Is in every heartbeat. At the center of consciousness in the body one can even feel the bio-electric pulse at the core of our collective consciousness. My spirit was pouring out a wonderfully integrated message that, again, I could not have imagined being more simple and understandable regardless of the language constraints. I was even able to construct some points in Spanish and still have them comprehended.
As I continued with detailing how incorporating the awareness of the pulse was
applied to our daily lives, allow us to enjoy walking in the new living
awareness of ONENESS. I gave some specific examples of how one could feel this
energy during interactions with others and how to anchor it further into the
daily living experience. The atmosphere felt so warm and open that it was quite
easy to allow the time necessary for translation, with questions for clarity, as
I normally move right along with instruction in English.
As I was nearing the end of the explanation
of the elder's vision, a young woman sitting to my
right asked, “Como te llamas?” What is your name? I answered, “Zendor.”
Immediately another young man in his early 30s asked in English, “What was
your name?” I gave the same reply, and began to wonder why they were asking
now, as I had introduced myself to everyone upon arrival. Then a third, another
woman, asked again with an air of confusion… “Como te llamas?” I replied
again, slightly annoyed and yet I knew something else was afoot. I could feel it
in my being. Then I asked my partner to find out what the heck was
going on. She asked the young woman to my right about the question of my name.
The reply was that this group was founded some 15 plus years before by a
man who had been contacted by extraterrestrials in Central America. He was told
to form groups in Central and South America with the purpose of learning how and
to open inner earth portals in specific locations. The information, over time,
was being ‘channeled’ by various individuals regarding the specifics. The
group was told that they were working with 49 guides from multiple dimensions,
only one of which was physically incarnate and acted as the liaison for the
other 48. His name is Xendor, pronounced Zendor in English.
Diana and I met somewhere in the ethers a couple of years before we actually connected on the physical plane. I remembered her from a vision I had. She was the product of a Russian immigrant that was a phenomenal mechanical engineer, and a Chilean woman also of eastern European decent. I look like a mixed breed of European decent as well, although I have not been able to trace my terrestrial heritage as my adoption and birth records have both been destroyed. Her initial 'look' in the vision that I had was of aggravation and impatience, like she wanted me to 'hurry up' in some way. We had no verbal or telepathic communication at that moment, just the gaze.
When we met in person, she relayed a story about a dream/vision she had just a week or so before we physically met in the United States. She said that she was escorted by the father of her two youngest boys, whom she was still living with in Chile, to one who seemed like a leader among leaders. She acknowledged this as being Ashtar, well-known amongst the metaphysical community as the Commander in Chief of the Galactic Fleet for this area. He told her that he was going to introduce her to his son, a long-standing cosmic mate of sorts, and that they would be together for a while and then not. He then introduced her to his 'son'... me... and left us alone. We gazed into each other's eyes for a moment after we hugged, still in our arms. Then we kissed. Her description of the kiss was as two serpents' tongues searching the depths of each other, finding union and birthing a third 'energy' in the process.
Now, upon our initial physical meeting, we both knew we knew each other somehow, yet neither one of our previous 'dream/visions' were in our conscious recognition at the time. My appearance in her life created great confusion and emotional trauma to her intimate other. Still, she felt that it was necessary for us to share the time together and invited me to Chile. During the month there I had several conversations with her intimate other, full of sound and furry on his part, and attempts at persuasion on my part, hoping that he could see the 'big picture' reason for our time together. Beyond all the wonderful experiences of my time there (with others), I felt somehow responsible for causing emotional pain and harm to their 'family' of several years. When I returned to the U.S. I continued to ponder the significance of our relationship and the immediate impact on our lives and many others. We both continued to act as if we were going to join in living together and pursue our Work. The week she was to fly to LA and help me prepare to pack up and move to Chile, the towers came down and all flights were cancelled. I still was not sure what it all meant. Maybe it had something to do with a previous event.
Meanwhile, I had met another through a vision as I was preparing to deliver a presentation at the event where Diana and I met. This woman in my vision, who I am with now, simply said, "Okay, are you ready to get to work?" Of course I agreed and off we went. I met her in person about 2 months later in Phoenix. I told her about everything, being brutally honest (as she called it), and that I needed to be able to follow through with this cycle of connections - where ever it led. She allowed me to do so and still remained in a 'loving' state of acceptance to our work together as well. I had not had this kind of acceptance in my life to date.
Honestly, it made me uncomfortable because I was used to people saying one thing and doing another emotionally. She did not.... and Diana and her (Robin) actually met in person shortly after the Gathering of Souls event. Diana came to America to visit me and I requested that they both meet each other as it was important to the integrity of our relationships. They agreed and we all met in a teepee at a friend's home in Phoenix, near the border of Scottsdale. The two of them hugged, kissed, hugged again and remained in each other's arms for a few moments gazing into each other's eyes in silence and love. I felt sooooooo loved too, that I cried at the openness they demonstrated to each other. Love was in the air and no one could deny its presence.
Months afterward, after moving back to Phoenix from LA and coming to terms with the fact that I was not moving to Chile after all... I came to the place of unconditional love in my relationship with Robin. In doing so, I recognized that at least part of my experience in Chile was to live out the judgment I had for my ex-wife's behavior at the end of our marriage. She brought another man into our relationship, gaining permission from me for him to live with us. It was one of the toughest decisions I've ever made, knowing that somehow my acceptance and allowance of her desires would benefit us all. He had shared a vision that he had of my wife while in the mountains north of Phoenix where he was told he was supposed to come and take care of her and our children while I carried out my mission.
As bizarre as it may seem, I knew in my heart that the essence of the vision was true. However, my humanness took over and after a few weeks I asked him to leave as I could not take the emotional trauma any longer. I became angry at my wife for even asking me to do this in the first place. So, my experience in Chile was from the opposite side of the coin so that I could see the importance of allowing Divine Will to prevail, even when I didn't consciously or emotionally understand what was happening at the time. I learned a great lesson here, and hoped that I had not done irreparable damage to Diana's family in the process. Robin taught me, through this process of my own, that love prevails as well, when you let go of attachment to outcome and pray for the best for all involved. I am truly blessed in this life. I hope that my sharing may help whoever reads this.
Namaste'